Becoming.

"The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day when you find out why."  Mark Twain

Yep, I totally saw that on a Facebook post the other day and it has been on my mind ever since.  I wonder if there really is a day when we find out why we were born.  I think it is more likely that we sorta know why we were born and those 'days' serve more to remind us of all the reasons we were meant to be here. 

I always knew I wanted to be a nurse.  When I was little, I have a vivid memory of making IV bottles out of cough syrup containers and yarn and attaching them to my dolls to make them better.  Sometimes I used real needles.  (Mom, you didn't just read that.)  I cut them open to take out their appendix.  I made casts.  I had the most accident prone and infected dolls on the planet and they all benefited from my nursing care.  (I also wanted to be a mom, but I will save you from my 'giving birth to dolls' stories.)

I loved watching Emergency (c'mon, you remember Randolph Mantooth?) and my favorite line was, "Start an IV with D5W."  They said it on every single show.  Go check it out on YouTube and you'll see that I'm right.  And don't even get me started on Trapper John, MD with the nurse with gorgeous legs and the doctor dude who wore cool surgical hats and lived in an RV in the hospital parking lot.  High quality 1970's TV right there.

It took me awhile to get to my goal.  I didn't start college until I was 32 and my three kids were in school.  I was so afraid that I couldn't do it that I didn't even pick nursing as my major until I got through College Algebra without driving off a bridge.  I figured if I could survive that, I could do the rest.  And I did.

But even with my interest and passion to be a nurse, I had no idea of how it would affect my life.  As convenient as it might be to just have a job that you can turn on and off at will, this thing I do seeps into every aspect of me.  It doesn't define me.  But it is certainly a part of me.

Being a nurse who works primarily with moms and babies brings its own unique share of joy.  To be present at the birth of a baby is the most life affirming act I think we can experience as human beings.  To see a baby's first breath, to touch untouched skin, to look into eyes and make a connection with a new soul. . .there is just no way to express the honor it is to share that experience with a family.

Some days, thankfully they are very few, are not what you would expect them to be.  But they are equally precious.  To hold a parents hand as they say goodbye to their baby they just met. . . even that moment is an honor to share with a family.  Painful, yes, but an honor still to be present and a part of a very special memory of a life that will never be forgotten.

I like to think that people are put where they are meant to be.  That every experience we have was meant for us.  Being a nurse may look like I'm helping others, but most of the time, I'm actually receiving more.  The gifts that parents give to me will far outweigh anything I could ever give to them.  They move me.  They inspire me.  And they give me hope.

I am so lucky to be able to do what I do.

Dear Baby V - thank you for sharing your first day with me.  Holding you like I did your sisters made my heart sing and completed the circle.  You are a blessing to us all.  :-)